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If you feel like it’s anything but fun and relaxing, your stress level is probably too high. “This often happens when a bride is consumed with pleasing everyone else and stops enjoying the process and the time with her significant other and closest circle,” Paulette Kouffman Sherman, Psy.D., director of My Dating & Relationship School and author of Dating from the Inside Out . She recommends taking a giant step back so that you can start to create fond memories of this time rather than asian and american dating edicate stressful, even painfully emotional, ones.
When we have a long and seemingly endless to-do list that we don’t particularly care to start checking off, we tend to push items off until the last minute. But, as Thompson explains, unlike asian american single dating sites procrastinating asia dating service in high school where a person may be able to cobble together a last minute paper that is passable, most people do not want the memories of their wedding to be barely stitched together. “Given that vendors are often booked months in advance, procrastinating can really work against brides when it comes to creating their dream wedding,” she says. To help address procrastination it is best to delegate wedding planning tasks to keep the planning process moving forward.
We forget that stress cause actual physical reactions such as headaches, stomach aches, muscle pain or tension, low energy, reduced sex drive, grinding teeth, insomnia, chest pain and nervousness. “Don’t forget that stress reduces your ability to fight off things like colds and the flu as well,” warns Maggie Hoop, LPCA, NCC, therapist who specializes in relationships. “Pay attention to what your body is telling you—if it’s trying to tell you to calm down and chill out, maybe you should listen to it before it does it for you.”
When it comes to the day you’ve been dreaming about since you were a little girl or boy, it’s hard to accept that it won’t go perfectly, from beginning to end, but, such is life! It will have the very same unexpected bumps and twists and turns (just hopefully a whole lot less) than any other event that has occurred in your life.
“There is no way to please everyone, including yourself all of the time, so aim for excellence rather than total perfection,” suggests Dr. “This will help you relax on the regular and soften your expectations.”
Fighting happens, especially when you’re under the kind of pressure that comes along with wedding planning. But if you and your partner are bickering back and forth more often than you have peaceful exchanges, your planning might be over the top. If you’re hardly feeling the love anymore with this important person you’re about to spend the rest of your life with, hit the reset button, stat.
Schedule a date night where wedding conversations are totally off limits. This way you can enjoy each other’s company and remember why you’re getting married in the first place.
If you decided to elope in the first place, good for you! But if you’re in the midst of planning your wedding ceremony and reception and are considering throwing the whole thing off and going to city hall to save your sanity, it’s time to chill out. “See the smiles on the faces of your guests, the intimate moments shared with your fiance throughout the day, the love felt from your bridal party and your first dance before a room of your biggest cheerleaders,” says Sachs. “Before giving into the idea of eloping, channel your original idea and get excited!”
It’s not always easy to tell when you, yourself, have turned into this monster of a wedding planner, but it’s worth keeping a close pulse on the potential that you’re getting close. If you’re on edge each time the topic of your wedding arises and can’t seem to relax when others give their two cents on a matter relating to your big day, you’re likely too stressed out, according to Sachs. She recommends re-centering your focus on why you’re getting married in the first place and trying your best to see the bigger picture.
If you’re starting to turn to negative coping mechanisms, such as drinking or smoking too much, you may be at the end of your rope.
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